GOD'S UNCONDITIONAL LOVE - HEALING THE WOUNDS OF INSECURITY

                                                  FROM PAIN TO PEACE
         GOD'S UNCONDITIONAL LOVE - HEALING THE WOUNDS OF INSECURITY

Ephesians 2:10 (ESV)
 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them
 
Philippians 4:6 (ESV)
do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

HOW DO WE DEVELOP INSECURITY?

Personally, development of insecurity began at an early age throughout my life.  "not being good enough". I felt expectations  at an early age to out "peform" everyone, to constantly improve, to be "better than".. I ended up trying to win unconditional love through approval . Everyone has things they deal with from childhood. However, in my 40s, I'm "starting" to realize my worth through God's unconditional love.  Finally, those select areas caused me enough misery to make this pivotal God-fed decision: I don't have to live this way anymore. I am beginning a new life......

SO ENOUGH ABOUT ME :).....can you identify with my story? - everyone has their own story. Here are some signs of insecurity (Stein, G, 2010):

1. Are you able to give a compliment? Even more important, can you graciously accept one? The latter behavior tends to be difficult for someone who is unsure of himself. He might blush or become flustered. Alternatively, he is prone to dismissing the validity of the praise, instead telling you why it isn’t true. What should one do if complimented? Simply smile and say “thank you.” Nothing more.

2. An inability to maintain eye contact is hard for many individuals who lack confidence. They will look away or look down, but rarely maintain the gaze of the other by looking into his or her eyes.

3. The self-doubting person tends to apologize a good deal when no apology is necessary. It is as if she expects to be reproached or is afraid to give offense; so, she prophylactically tries to excuse any possible mistake on her part in order to avoid just such a response.

4. Answering a question with an upward inflection of the voice has been heard or done by everyone. The person being questioned doesn’t have certainty about his answer, so he replies with a tone of voice that betrays his insecurity.

5. Men and women who are uncomfortable with sharing personal information for fear of being judged will oft-times turn the conversation to a different topic, away from anything that might make them vulnerable or reveal too much. This is also called “changing the subject.”

6. One way of inoculating yourself against criticism is to make jokes at your own expense. Do this too often and others may conclude that you put yourself down because you believe yourself to be seriously flawed

HOW TO OVERCOME INSECURITY THROUGH GOD'S GUIDANCE AND LOVE?

Discover God’s goodness to overcome perfectionism. When you ask the question, “Am I enough?” realize that you are, thanks to God’s goodness that gives you grace when you fall short and empowers you to grow. Don’t compare yourself to other women, give into envy or jealousy, insist on following your own agenda rather than God’s good plans for you, take credit for your strengths instead of recognizing that they’re God-given gifts, or give up when you fail rather than relying on the confidence God wants to give you. You don’t have to earn God’s love; He already loves you completely and unconditionally. His favor is based on His mercy, not on your desire or efforts. He has already made it possible for you to do whatever He calls you to do, simply by trusting Him and relying on His strength working through you. Even when you can’t see Him, remember that God is always at work bringing good outcomes out of even the worst circumstances in your life. Every day, make time to thank God for specific ways He has helped you in the past and is helping you now. Trust Him to continue to act according to what’s best for you in the future. Instead of trying to force situations to work out the way you want, surrender frustrating situations to God, telling Him that you trust Him to work them out in the right way at the right time. Celebrate God’s goodness to you by praising Him and picking up or buying a special memento that commemorates a specific answered prayer.

ASSIGNMENTS TO BUILD CONFIDENCE AND BASK IN GOD'S LOVE

1. Write a prayer/need list for yourself to help through this journey of self acceptance through God's love. Read and meditate on God’s promises from Scripture that apply to the challenges you’re currently facing. Trust God to help you in every area of your life rather than withholding certain parts from Him. Thank God for the many ways He has delivered you in the past, and trust Him to continue to do so.
2. When in prayer,  Look to God to complete you – not another person. Instead of bemoaning frustrating circumstances, focus on the state of your heart, asking God to give you the internal peace that will fulfill you despite your circumstances.
3.Pray for the courage you need to make decisions that please God, no matter how others might react. Give other people grace when you disagree with them, trusting God to judge them however He sees fit. Read Scripture passages about God’s love for you, and trust that all of His actions toward you are motivated by His great love.

PRAYER FOR TODAY:

DEAR FATHER GOD - I AM SO THANKFUL FOR YOUR LOVE FOR ME. PLEASE HELP ME TO KNOW THAT WHEN I AM ANXIOUS AND INSECURE, YOU WILL PROVIDE PEACE IF I JUST CALL YOUR NAME.  PLEASE BE WITH ME TO HAVE THE COURAGE TO FACE THE ROOTS OF MY INSECURITY AND BEGIN THE PROCESS OF HEALING. HELP ME TO ENCOURAGE AND HELP OTHERS THAT OUR STRUGGLING IN THESE AREAS TOO. HELP ME BE A REFLECTION OF YOUR ALMIGHTY LOVE AND FORGIVING HEART. AMEN

Stein, G. (2010)Signs of Insecurity: Behavior That Reveals a Lack of Confidence. Wordpress Publishing.
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version (2001) by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers